To Rafa (Part II)

Dear Rafa,

I am wondering if you’re alright. I really am.

Our encounter from last year was brief but let me tell you once again how beautiful it was.

You’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met. (Despite the fact that you don’t look like it. Forgive me. You’re too cute.)

In any event, I am writing this now because I miss you.

I am not sure if I really do, I guess regret is just trying to kill me right now.

Remember that night when I met you?

When we talked and things got a little sexual and then it got a little too academic and then it got personal?

Well everything’s still vivid to me.

You were nothing short of spectacular. I really hope I could meet you again.

Remember when I told you that I needed to go? Remember how I was trying to get you to ask for my number, but you didn’t. I wasn’t brave enough to give it to you. I wasn’t brave enough to ask for your number.

Maybe it was pride?

Pride because we didn’t want to appear too eager.

But I was beyond eager, I was captivated. And just like every other 20 year-old millennial, I shied away from the opportunity of being your friend.

I can still recall your face when I told you goodbye.

Reluctance is etched on your plastered smile as it is on mine and neither of us dared to stop each other from leaving.

Why are we such hardheaded people?

And so fast forward to today, here I am still wondering if we would have worked. I am still wondering if you’re still trying to study Deutsch. (If you are, I bet you’re better now and I bet you’re still having a hard time with it.)

I am still wondering as to what could have happened if we stayed a little longer, talked a little more, and got to know each other a little better.

I guess I’ll just have to pray to the gods and hope for the best.

For when I see you again, I won’t second guess.

 

P.S.

I hope you still think about me too.

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